One reader has just written...I can't believe I haven't found this blog earlier. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. My story is long so I willcut it down to being in Perth yet finding myself (without understanding) under the influence of the Sydney Anglicans via uwa Christian union. They told me to leave my beautiful atheist boyfriend and become engaged to a Christian man. I did, and he physically beat me into submission. Ever since then (2001) I have had issues with this group but felt like a lone voice in the wilderness. Thank you for speaking up on my behalf! I hope we can stop these evil men and protect young women from going through the same thing I did.


http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/Domestic_violence_why_men_abuse_women
"My view is that the need to control is an addiction. To those who are vulnerable to this addiction, certain things make them more vulnerable.
A person who is likely to become a control addict and therefore act out in violent ways, is made more likely to become addicted by the following –
entitlement to greater rights than others
blaming the behaviour of others
being able to isolate the person they are controlling
Since there are always some people who are vulnerable to this addiction, the vow to submit, necessarily puts them in a position where they are more likely to become addicted to control. They feel entitled because they have been the receiver of this vow, they also have plenty of amunition to blame the victim because she has been secular in her view of autonomy and refuses to surrender all her basic human rights.
Regardless of the theology behind this, it is tragic that men and women who are vulnerable to this addiction, are not helped out more by the church. The church ought to teach that the vow of submission can be a bad thing in certain cases, and ought never to be used in a situation where the husband wants it used. That’s a sign of trouble in the first place.
Wives need to be taught that wanting basic human rights is not worldly, selfish, sinful or rebellious. Women need assertiveness training.
There is no use pretending that violence and coercion does not happen. even if the percentage is only 10%, surely those men and women are worthy of help from the church."
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